Decision Paralysis

I'm sure you're familiar with the fight or flight response. Pretty self explanatory and is used as an oversimplification of the different types of reactions we can tend to have.

What's not so familiar or well known is that in addition to fight or flight, there's a third reaction response we can have. Freeze.

And in my opinion, that third one - freezing - can be just as bad or detrimental as fighting or fleeing.

Basically, the freeze response is that when you're confronted with an issue, a situation, a decision, etc. instead of becoming confrontational or running away from the issue, you just seize up. Like a deer in the headlights.

This actually just happened to me recently, but I didn't recognize that I was having a freeze response until the end of the day, simply because, well, it's just not as popular as fight or flight.

The freeze response tends to crop up when I have a decision to make. But why do we have this reaction and where does it come from?

Basically, freezing can stem from a bunch of different things like perfectionism, societal expectations, familial expectations, social (as in peer) expectations, personal expectations, and even anxiety.

I'm not going to expand on any of the reasons why we freeze or else this would be a much longer post.

What I'm more interested in is how to move through this freeze response, so that even if you do seize up, you don't have to stay there.

I'll say, sometimes just realizing that you're freezing is enough to snap you out of it and back in motion.

Other times, there might be some unresolved issues that you might want to look at, so that it doesn't keep popping up when you go to make decisions.

But for now, here are a few tips to help kick you back into gear.

1. Take action.

   Any action. Because no matter how small of an action you take, it's not so much the size that is important but the means to get moving again and build up momentum. And that's exactly what actions - no matter how small - do. They build up your momentum.

   Also realize, that not taking action is also a decision. - A little food for thought.

   Another bit to chew on is the saying "action always beats inaction."

   
   

2. Reframe the situation.

   For me, decision paralysis tends to happen when I'm faced with options that I both want. For example, I can either go for a walk or read a book.

   Instead of getting stuck in decision paralysis and not doing either, try to look at your options from a different perspective. A lot of times you can either combine or compromise.

   In this case some ways I can move forward are going for a walk today and reading a book this evening or even tomorrow. Or combining my activities by going for a walk while listening to an audio book.

   It might take getting a little creative, but if you loosen up your brain space there's usually a really good solution.

   
   

3. Love and support yourself.

   A lot of times, after freezing, I'll start getting down about wasted time and opportunities.

   Don't do that to yourself. Life is a learning experience and if you're having a freeze response it's probably a symptom of some underlying PTSD or stress or anxiety. So be kind to yourself and remember that love heals.

   That being said, if freezing is interfering with your life or if you've been stuck in a freeze response for a long time it's always a good idea to get some extra help and support.

Here's to getting back in gear! 🥂

Here's a really great post about this topic to check out! (Not sponsored or affiliated, just something I came across). https://www.muriellemarie.com/blog/how-to-overcome-the-freeze-response-when-you-need-to-make-a-choice-or-a-decision